im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize