Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
