My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
God I need to hump something, right now.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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