yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
