Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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