for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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