Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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