is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
