So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
