I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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