She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
