Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Randomize
