It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Boobs speak an international language.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
