IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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