If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
