I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
