I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
