I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
