i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
