Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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