I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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