It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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