Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
