I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
