i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
