He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
