hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
