The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
