I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
