you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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