There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
