hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
me + whiskey = a bad person
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
