bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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