WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
