soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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