just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
