So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
