Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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