i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Randomize