This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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