2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize