I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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