We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
party gras won. party gras always wins.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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