My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
