Are we in a gay sports bar?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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