I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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