would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
