Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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