he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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