So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
